Secret of divine communion — Master's respect for other faiths — Many names of one God — Spiritual disciplines necessary at the beginning — "Woman and gold" is the obstruction to yoga — God and worldly duties — Duty toward family — Different groups of devotees — Different moods of aspirants — Seeing God everywhere — Worship of the Divine Mother — Master's attitude toward women — His love for Narendra — Krishnakishore's faith — Master's outspokenness — His anguish at worldly talk — His ecstasy in kirtan — A devotee's dream — Disciplines of Tantra — All is possible with God — Discrimination and dispassion — Futility of mere lecturing — Purification of mind — Narendra's many virtues — Meditation on God with form — Brahman and Divine Incarnations — Master's ecstasy at Vrindavan.
August 13, 1882
THE MASTER WAS CONVERSING with
Kedar and some other devotees in his
room in the temple garden. Kedar was a government official and
had spent several years at Dacca, in East Bengal, where he had become
a friend of Vijay Goswami. The two would spend a great part of their
time
together, talking about Sri Ramakrishna and his spiritual experiences.
Kedar
had once been a member of the Brahmo Samaj. He followed the path of
bhakti. Spiritual talk always brought tears to his eyes.
It was five o'clock in the afternoon. Kedar was very happy that day,
having arranged a religious festival for Sri Ramakrishna. A singer had
been
hired by Ram, and the whole day passed in joy.
The Master explained to the devotees the secret of communion with God.
MASTER: "With the realization of
Satchidananda one goes into samadhi.
Then duties drop away. Suppose I have been talking about the ostad and
he arrives. What need is there of talking about him then? How long does
the bee buzz around? So long as it isn't sitting on a flower. But it
will not
do for the sadhaka to renounce duties. He should perform his duties,
such
as worship, japa, meditation, prayer, and pilgrimage.
"If you see someone engaged in reasoning even after he has realized
God,
you may liken him to a bee, which also buzzes a little even while
sipping
honey from a flower."
The Master was highly pleased with the ostad's music. He said to the
musician, "There is a special manifestation of God's power in a man who
has any outstanding gift, such as proficiency in music."
MUSICIAN: "Sir, what is the way
to realize God?"
MASTER: "Bhakti is the one essential
thing. To be sure. God exists in all
beings. Who, then, is a devotee? He whose mind dwells on God. But this
is
not possible as long as one has egotism and vanity. The water of God's
grace
cannot collect on the high mound of egotism. It runs down. I am a mere
machine.
(To Kedar and the other devotees) "God can be
realized through all paths.
All religions are true. The important thing is to reach the roof. You
can
reach it by stone stairs or by wooden stairs or by bamboo steps or by a
rope.
You can also climb up by a bamboo pole.
"You may say that there are many errors and superstitions in another
religion. I should reply: Suppose there are. Every religion has errors.
Everyone
thinks that his watch alone gives the correct time. It is enough to
have
yearning for God. It is enough to love Him and feel attracted to Him.
Don't
you know that God is the Inner Guide? He sees the longing of our heart
and the yearning of our soul. Suppose a man has several sons. The older
boys address him distinctly as 'Baba' or 'Papa', but the babies can at
best
call him 'Ba' or 'Pa'. Now, will the father be angry with those who
address
him in this indistinct way? The father knows that they too are calling
him,
only they cannot pronounce his name well. All children are the same to
the father. Likewise, the devotees call on God alone, though by
different
names. They call on one Person only. God is one, but His names are
many."
Thursday, August 24, 1882
Sri Ramakrishna was talking to Hazra on the long northeast
verandah of
his room, when M. arrived. He saluted the Master reverently.
MASTER: "I should like to visit
Iswar Chandra Vidyasagar a few times
more. The painter first draws the general outlines and then puts in the
details and colours at his leisure. The moulder first makes the image
out of
clay, then plasters it, then gives it a coat of whitewash, and last of
all paints
it with a brush. All these steps must be taken successively. Vidyasagar
is
fully ready, but his inner stuff is covered with a thin layer. He is
now
engaged in doing good works; but he doesn't know what is within
himself.
Gold is hidden within him. God dwells within us. If one knows that, one
feels like giving up all activities and praying to God with a yearning
soul."
So the Master talked with M. — now standing, now pacing up and down
the long verandah.
MASTER: "A little spiritual discipline
is necessary in order to know what lies within."
M: "Is it necessary to practise discipline all through life?"
MASTER: "No. But one must be up and doing
in the beginning. After
that one need not work hard. The helmsman stands up and clutches the
rudder firmly as long as the boat is passing through waves, storms,
high
wind, or around the curves of a river; but he relaxes after steering
through
them. As soon as the boat passes the curves and the helmsman feels a
favourable
wind, he sits comfortably and just touches the rudder. Next he
prepares to unfurl the sail and gets ready for a smoke. Likewise, the
aspirant
enjoys peace and calm after passing the waves and storms of 'woman and
gold'.
"Some are born with the characteristics of the yogi; but they too
should
be careful. It is 'woman and gold' alone that is the obstacle; it makes
them
deviate from the path of yoga and drags them into worldliness. Perhaps
they
have some desire for enjoyment. After fulfilling their desire, they
again
direct their minds to God and thus recover their former state of mind,
fit
for the practise of yoga.
"Have you ever seen the spring trap for fish, called the 'satka-kal'?"
M: "No, sir, I haven't seen it."
MASTER: 'They use it in our part of
the country. One end of a bamboo
pole is fastened in the ground, and the other is bent over with a
catch. From
this end a line with a hook hangs over the water, with bait tied to the
hook.
When the fish swallows the bait, suddenly the bamboo jumps up and
regains its upright position.
"Again, take a pair of scales, for example. If a weight is placed on
one
side, the lower needle moves away from the upper one. The lower needle
is the mind, and the upper one, God. The meeting of the two is yoga.
"Unless the mind becomes steady there cannot be yoga. It is the wind of
worldliness that always disturbs the mind, which may be likened to a
candle-flame.
If that flame doesn't move at all, then one is said to have attained
yoga.
'Woman and gold' alone is the obstacle to 'yoga. Always analyse what
you see. What is there in the. body of a woman? Only such things as
blood,
flesh, fat, entrails, and the like. Why should one love such a body?
"Sometimes I used to assume a rajasic mood in order to practise
renunciation.
Once I had the desire to put on a gold-embroidered robe, wear a ring
on my finger, and smoke a hubble-bubble with a long pipe. Mathur Babu
procured all these things for me. I wore the gold-embroidered robe and
said
to myself after a while, 'Mind! This is what is called a
gold-embroidered
robe.' Then I took it off and threw it away. I couldn't stand the robe
any
more. Again I said to myself, 'Mind! This is called a shawl, and this a
ring,
and this, smoking a hubble-bubble with a long pipe.' I threw those
things
away once for all, and the desire to enjoy them never arose in my mind
again."
It was almost dusk. The Master and M. stood talking alone near the
door on the southeast verandah.
MASTER (to M.): "The mind of the
yogi is always fixed on God, always
absorbed in the Self. You can recognize such a man by merely looking at
him. His eyes are wide open, with an aimless look, like. the eyes of
the
mother bird hatching her eggs. Her entire mind is fixed on the eggs,
and
there is a vacant look in her eyes. Can you show me such a picture?"
M: "I shall try to get one."
As evening came on, the temples were lighted up. Sri Ramakrishna was
seated on his small couch, meditating on the Divine Mother. Then he
chanted the names of God. Incense was burnt in the room, where an oil
lamp had been lighted. Sounds of conch-shells and gongs came floating
on
the air as the evening worship began in the temple of Kali. The light
of
the moon flooded all the quarters. The Master again spoke to M.
MASTER: "Perform your duties in an
unselfish spirit. The work that
Vidyasagar is engaged in is very good. Always try to perform your
duties
without desiring any result."
M: "Yes, sir. But may I know if one can realize God while performing
one's duties? Can 'Rama' and 'desire' coexist? The other day I read in
a
Hindi couplet: 'Where Rama is, there desire cannot be; where desire is,
there Rama cannot be.'"
MASTER: "All, without exception, perform
work. Even to chant the name
and glories of God is work, as is the meditation of the non-dualist on
'I am
He'. Breathing is also an activity. There is no way of renouncing work
altogether. So do your work, but surrender the result to God."
M: "Sir, may I make an effort to earn more money?"
MASTER: "It is permissible to do so to
maintain a religious family. You
may try to increase your income, but in an honest way. The goal of life
is
not the earning of money, but the service of God. Money is not harmful
if
it is devoted to the service of God."
M: "How long should a man feel obliged to do his duty toward his wife
and children?"
MASTER: "As long as they-feel pinched
for food and clothing. But one
need not take the responsibility of a son when he is able to support
himself.
When the young fledgling learns to pick its own food, its mother pecks
it
if it comes to her for food."
M: "How long must one do one's duty?"
MASTER: "The blossom drops off when the
fruit appears. One doesn't
have to do one's duty after the attainment of God, nor does one feel
like
doing it then.
"If a drunkard takes too much liquor he cannot retain consciousness. If
he takes only two or three glasses, he can go on with his work. As you
advance nearer and nearer to God, He will reduce your activities little
by
little. Have no fear.
"Finish the few duties you have at hand, and then you will have peace.
When the mistress of the house goes to bathe after finishing her
cooking
and other household duties, she won't come back, however you may shout
after her."
M: "Sir, what is the meaning of the realization of God? What do you
mean by God-vision? How does one attain it?"
MASTER: "According to the Vaishnavas
the aspirants and the seers of
God may be divided into different groups. These are the pravartaka, the
sadhaka, the siddha, and the siddha of the siddha. He who has just set
foot
on the path may be called a pravartaka. He may be called a sadhaka who
has for some time been practising spiritual disciplines such as
worship, japa,
meditation, and the chanting of God's name and glories. He may be
called
a siddha who has known from his inner experience that God exists. An
analogy is given in the Vedanta to explain this. The master of the
house is
asleep in a dark room. Someone is groping in the darkness to find him.
He touches the couch and says, 'No, it is not he.' He touches the
window
and says, 'No, it is not he.' He touches the door and says, 'No, it is
not he.'
This is known in the Vedanta as the process of 'Neti, neti', 'Not this,
not
this'. At last his hand touches the master's body and he exclaims,
'Here he
is!' In other words, he is now conscious of the 'existence' of the
master. He
has found him, but he doesn't yet know him intimately.
"There is another type, known as the siddha of the siddha, the
'supremely
perfect'. It is quite a different thing when one talks to the master
intimately,
when one knows God very intimately through love and devotion. A siddha
has undoubtedly attained God, but the 'supremely perfect' has known God
very intimately.
"But in order to realize God, one must assume one of these attitudes:
santa,
dasya, sakhya, vatsalya, or madhur.
"Santa, the serene attitude. The rishis of olden times had this
attitude
toward God. They did not desire any worldly enjoyment. It is like the
single-minded devotion of a wife to her husband. She knows that her
husband
is the embodiment of beauty and love, a veritable Madan.
"Dasya, the attitude of a servant toward his master. Hanuman had this
attitude toward Rama. He felt the strength of a lion when he worked for
Rama. A wife feels this mood also. She serves her husband with all her
heart and soul. A mother also has a little of this attitude, as Yasoda
had
toward Krishna.
"Sakhya, the attitude of friendship. Friends say to one another, 'Come
here and sit near me.' Sridama and other friends sometimes fed Krishna
with fruit, part of which they had already eaten, and sometimes climbed
on His shoulders.
"Vatsalya, the attitude of a mother toward her child. This was Yasoda's
attitude toward Krishna. The wife, too, has a little of this. She feeds
her
husband with her very life-blood, as it were. The mother feels happy
only
when the child has eaten to his heart's content. Yasoda would roam
about
with butter in her hand, in order to feed Krishna.
"Madhur, the attitude of a woman toward her paramour. Radha had this
attitude toward Krishna. The wife also feels it for her husband. This
attitude
includes all the other four."
M: "When one sees God does one see Him with these eyes?"
MASTER: "God cannot be seen with these
physical eves. In the course of
spiritual discipline one gets a 'love body', endowed with 'love eves',
'love
ears', and so on. One sees God with those 'love eyes'. One hears the
voice of
God with those 'love ears'. One even gets a sexual organ made of love."
At these words M. burst out laughing. The Master continued, unannoyed,
"With this 'love body' the soul communes with God."
M. again became serious.
MASTER: "But this is not possible
without intense love of God. One sees
nothing but God everywhere when one loves Him with great intensity. It
is like a person with jaundice, who sees everything yellow. Then one
feels,
'I am verily He.'
"A drunkard, deeply intoxicated, says, 'Verily I am Kali!' The gopis,
intoxicated with love, exclaimed, 'Verily I am Krishna!
"One who thinks of God, day and night, beholds Him everywhere. It is
like a man's seeing flames on all sides after he has gazed fixedly at
one
flame for some time."
"But that isn't the real flame", flashed through M.'s mind.
Sri Ramakrishna, who could read a man's inmost thought, said: "One
doesn't lose consciousness by thinking of Him who is all Spirit, all
Consciousness. Shivanath once remarked that too much thinking about God
confounds the brain. Thereupon I said to him, 'How can one become
unconscious by thinking of Consciousness?'"
M: "Yes, sir, I realize that. It isn't like thinking of an unreal
object. How
can a man lose his intelligence if he always fixes his mind on Him
whose
very nature is eternal Intelligence?"
MASTER (with pleasure): "It is
through God's grace that you understand
that. The doubts of the mind will not disappear without His grace.
Doubts
do not disappear without Self-realization.
"But one need not fear anything if one has received the grace of God.
It is rather easy for a child to stumble if he holds his father's hand;
but
there can be no such fear if the father holds the child's hand. A man
does
not have to suffer any more if God, in His grace, removes his doubts
and
reveals Himself to him. But this grace descends upon him only after he
has
prayed to God with intense yearning of heart and practised spiritual
discipline.
The mother feels compassion for her child when she sees him running
about breathlessly. She has been hiding herself; now she appears before
the child."
"But why should God make us run about?" thought M.
Immediately Sri Ramakrishna said: "It is His will that we should run
about a little. Then it is great fun. God has created the world in
play, as it
were. This is called Mahamaya, the Great Illusion. Therefore one must
take
refuge in the Divine Mother, the Cosmic Power Itself. It is She who has
bound us with the shackles of illusion. The realization of God is
possible
only when those shackles are severed."
The Master continued: "One must propitiate the Divine Mother, the
Primal Energy, in order to obtain God's grace. God Himself is Mahamaya,
who deludes the world with Her illusion and conjures up the magic of
creation, preservation, and destruction. She has spread this veil of
ignorance
before our eyes. We can go into the inner chamber only when She lets us
pass through the door. Living outside, we see only outer objects, but
not
that Eternal Being, Existence-Knowledge-Bliss Absolute. Therefore it is
stated in the Purana that deities like Brahma praised Mahamaya for the
destruction of the demons Madhu and Kaitabha.
"Sakti alone is the root of the universe. That Primal Energy has two
aspects: vidya and avidya. Avidya deludes. Avidya conjures up 'woman
and
gold', which casts the spell. Vidya begets devotion, kindness, wisdom,
and
love, which lead one to God. This avidya must be propitiated, and that
is
the purpose of the rites of Sakti worship.
( In this worship a woman is regarded as the
representation of the Divine Mother.)
"The devotee assumes various attitudes toward Sakti in order to
propitiate Her: the attitude of a handmaid, a 'hero', or a
child. A hero's attitude
is to please Her even as a man pleases a woman through intercourse.
"The worship of Sakti is extremely difficult. It is no joke. I passed
two
years as the handmaid and companion of the Divine Mother. But my
natural attitude has always been that of a child toward its mother. I
regard
the breasts of any woman as those of my own mother.
"Women are, all of them, the veritable images of Sakti. In northwest
India the bride holds a knife in her hand at the time of marriage; in
Bengal,
a nut-cutter. The meaning is that the bridegroom, with the help of the
bride, who is the embodiment of the Divine Power, will sever the
bondage
of illusion. This is the 'heroic' attitude. I never worshipped the
Divine
Mother that way. My attitude toward Her is that of a child toward its
mother.
"The bride is the very embodiment of Sakti. Haven't you noticed, at the
marriage ceremony, how the groom sits behind like an idiot? But the
bride —
she is so bold!
"After attaining God one forgets His external splendour, the glories of
His creation. One doesn't think of God's glories after one has seen
Him.
The devotee, once immersed in God's Bliss, doesn't calculate any more
about
outer things. When I see Narendra, I don't need to ask him: 'What's
your
name? Where do you live?' Where is the time for such questions? Once a
man asked Hanuman which day of the fortnight it was. 'Brother,' said
Hanuman, 'I don't know anything of the day of the week, or the
fortnight,
or the position of the stars. I think of Rama alone.'"
October 16, 1882
It was Monday, a few days before the Durga Puja, the festival
of the
Divine Mother. Sri Ramakrishna was in a very happy state of mind, for
Narendra was with him. Narendra had brought two or three young members
of the Brahmo Samaj to the temple garden. Besides these, Rakhal,
Ramlal,
Hazra, and M. were with the Master.
Narendra had his midday meal with Sri Ramakrishna. Afterwards a
temporary bed was made on the floor of the Master's room so that the
disciples
might rest awhile. A mat was spread, over which was placed a quilt
covered
with a white sheet. A few cushions and pillows completed the simple
bed.
Like a child, the Master sat near Narendranath on the bed. He talked
with
the devotees in great delight. With a radiant smile lighting his face,
and his
eyes fixed on Narendra, he was giving them various spiritual teachings,
interspersing these with incidents from his own life.
MASTER: "After I had experienced
samadhi, my mind craved intensely
to hear only about God. I would always search for places where they
were
reciting or explaining the sacred books, such as the Bhagavata, the
Mahabharata,
and the Adhyatma Ramayana. I used to go to
Krishnakishore to hear
him read the Adhyatma Ramayana.
"What tremendous faith Krishnakishore had! Once, while at Vrindavan,
he felt thirsty and went to a well. Near it he saw a man standing. On
being
asked to draw a little water for him, the man said: 'I belong to a low
caste,
sir. You are a brahmin. How can I draw water for you?' Krishnakishore
said: Take the name of Siva. By repeating His holy name you will make
yourself pure.' The low-caste man did as he was told, and
Krishnakishore,
orthodox brahmin that he was, drank that water. What tremendous faith!
"Once a holy man came to the bank of the Ganges and lived near the
bathing-ghat at Ariadaha, not far from Dakshineswar. We thought of
paying
him a visit. I said to Haladhari; 'Krishnakishore and I are going to
see a holy
man. Will you come with us?' Haladhari replied, 'What is the use of
seeing
a mere human body, which is no better than a cage of clay?' Haladhari
was
a student of the Gita and Vedanta philosophy, and
therefore referred to the
holy man as a mere 'cage of clay'. I repeated this to Krishnakishore.
With
great anger he said: "How impudent of Haladhari to make such a remark!
How can he ridicule as a "cage of clay" the body of a man who
constantly
thinks of God, who meditates on Rama, and has renounced all for the
sake
of the Lord? Doesn't he know that such a man is the embodiment of
Spirit?' He was so upset by Haladhari's remarks that he would turn his
face
away from him whenever he met him in the temple garden, and stopped
speaking to him.
"Once Krishnakishore asked me, 'Why have you cast off the sacred
thread?'
In those days of God-vision I felt as if I were passing through the
great
storm of Aswin, (The Master referred to the great
cyclone of 1864.) and everything had blown away from me. No trace of my
old self was left. I lost all consciousness of the world. I could
hardly keep my
cloth on my body, not to speak of the sacred thread! I said to
Krishnakishore,
'Ah, you will understand if you ever happen to be as intoxicated with
God
as I was.'
"And it actually came to pass. He too passed through a God-intoxicated
state, when he would repeat only the word 'Om' and shut himself up
alone in
his room. His relatives thought he was actually mad, and called in a
physician.
Ram Kaviraj of Natagore came to see him. Krishnakishore said to the
physician, 'Cure me, sir, of my malady, if you please, but not of my
Om.'
(All laugh.)
"One day I went to see him and found him in a pensive mood. When I
asked him about it, he said: 'The tax-collector was here. He threatened
to
dispose of my brass pots, my cups, and my few utensils, if I didn't pay
the
tax; so I am worried.' I said: 'But why should you worry about it? Let
him
take away your pots and pans. Let him arrest your body even. How will
that affect you? For your nature is that of Kha!'
(Narendra and the others
laugh.) He used to say to me that he was the Spirit,
all-pervading as the
sky. He had got that idea from the Adhyatma Ramayana.
I used to tease
him now and then, addressing him as 'Kha'. Therefore I said to him that
day, with a smile: You are Kha. Taxes cannot move you!'
"In that state of God-intoxication I used to speak out my mind to all.
I
was no respecter of persons. Even to men of position I was not afraid
to
speak the truth.
"One day Jatindra (A titled aristocrat of
Calcutta.) came to the garden of Jadu Mallick. I was there too.
I asked him: 'What is the duty of man? Isn't it our duty to think of
God?'
Jatindra replied: 'We are worldly people. How is it possible for us to
achieve
liberation? Even King Yudhisthira had to have a vision of hell.' This
made
me very angry. I said to him: 'What sort of man are you? Of all the
incidents
of Yudhisthira's life, you remember only his seeing hell. You don't
remember
his truthfulness, his forbearance, his patience, his discrimination,
his
dispassion, his devotion to God.' I was about to say many more things,
when
Hriday stopped my mouth. After a little while Jatindra left the place,
saying
he had some other business to attend to.
"Many days later I went with Captain to see Raja (A
title conferred on Sourindra by the Government of India. The word
"raja"
really means "ruler of a kingdom".) Sourindra Tagore. As
soon as I met him, I said, 'I can't address you as "Raja", or by any
such title,
for I should be telling a lie.' He talked to me a few minutes, but even
so
our conversation was interrupted by the frequent visits of Europeans
and
others. A man of rajasic temperament, Sourindra was naturally busy with
many things. Jatindra, his eldest brother, had been told of my coming,
but
he sent word that he had a pain in his throat and couldn't go out.
"One day, in that state of divine intoxication, I went to the
bathing-ghat
on the Ganges at Baranagore. There I saw Jaya Mukherji repeating the
name of God; but his mind was on something else. I went up and slapped
him twice on the cheeks.
"At one time Rani Rasmani was staying in the temple garden. She came
to the shrine of the Divine Mother, as she frequently did when I
worshipped
Kali, and asked me to sing a song or two. On this occasion, while I was
singing, I noticed she was sorting the flowers for worship
absent-mindedly.
At once I slapped her on the cheeks. She became quite embarrassed and
sat there with folded hands.
"Alarmed at this state of mind myself, I said to my cousin Haladhari:
'Just see my nature! How can I get rid of it?' After praying to the
Divine
Mother tor some time with great yearning, I was able to shake off this
habit.
"When one gets into such a state of mind, one doesn't enjoy any
conversation but that about God. I used to weep when I heard people
talk
about worldly matters. When I accompanied Mathur Babu on a pilgrimage,
we spent a few days in Benares at Raja Babu's house. One day I was
seated
in the drawing-room with Mathur Babu, Raja Babu, and others. Hearing
them talk about various worldly things, such as their business losses
and so
forth, I wept bitterly and said to the Divine Mother: 'Mother, where
have
You brought me? I was much better off in the temple garden at
Dakshineswar.
Here I am in a place where I must hear about "woman and gold". But at
Dakshineswar I could avoid it.'"
The Master asked the devotees, especially Narendra, to rest awhile, and
he himself lay down on the smaller couch.
Late in the afternoon Narendra sang. Rakhal, Latu, (A
young disciple of the Master, who later became a monk under the name of
Swami Adbhutananda.) M., Hazra, and
Priya, Narendra's Brahmo friend, were present. The singing was
accompanied
by the drum:
Meditate, O my mind, on the Lord Hari,
The Stainless One, Pure Spirit through and through.
How peerless is the light that in Him shines!
How soul-bewitching is His wondrous form!
How dear is He to all His devotees! . . .
After this song Narendra sang:
Oh, when will dawn for me that day of blessedness
When He who is all Good, all Beauty, and all Truth,
Will light the inmost shrine of my heart?
When shall I sink at last, ever beholding Him,
Into that Ocean of Delight?
Lord, as Infinite Wisdom Thou shalt enter my soul,
And my unquiet mind, made speechless by Thy sight,
Will find a haven at Thy feet.
In my heart's firmament, O Lord, Thou wilt arise
As Blissful Immortality;
And as, when the chakora beholds the rising moon,
It sports about for very joy,
So, too, shall I be filled with heavenly happiness
When Thou appearest unto me.
Thou One without a Second, all Peace, the King of Kings!
At Thy beloved feet I shall renounce my life
And so at last shall gain life's goal;
I shall enjoy the bliss of heaven while yet on earth!
Where else is a boon so rare bestowed?
Then shall I see Thy glory, pure and untouched by stain;
As darkness flees from light, so will my darkest sins
Desert me at Thy dawn's approach.
Kindle in me, O Lord, the blazing fire of faith
To be the pole-star of my life;
O Succour of the weak, fulfil my one desire!
Then shall I bathe both day and night
In the boundless bliss of Thy Love, and utterly forget
Myself, O Lord, attaining Thee.
Narendra sang again:
With beaming face chant the sweet name of God
Till in your heart the nectar overflows.
Drink of it ceaselessly and share it with all!
If ever your heart runs dry, parched by the flames
Of worldly desire, chant the sweet name of God,
And heavenly love will moisten your arid soul.
Be sure, O mind, you never forget to chant
His holy name: when danger stares in your face,
Call on Him, your Father Compassionate;
With His name's thunder, snap the fetters of sin!
Come, let us fulfil our hearts' desires
By drinking deep of Everlasting Joy,
Made one with Him in Love's pure ecstasy.
Now Narendra and the devotees began to sing kirtan, accompanied by the drum and cymbals. They moved round and round the Master as they sang:
Immerse yourself for evermore, O mind,
In Him who is Pure Knowledge and Pure Bliss.
Next they sang:
Oh, when will dawn for me that day of blessedness
When He who is all Good, all Beauty, and all Truth
Will light the inmost shrine of my heart? . . .
At last Narendra himself was playing on the drums, and he sang with the Master, full of joy:
With beaming face chant the sweet name of God . . .
When the music was over, Sri Ramakrishna held Narendra in his
arms a
long time and said, "You have made us so happy today!" The flood-gate
of
the Master's heart was open so wide, that night, that he could hardly
contain
himself for joy. It was eight o'clock in the evening. Intoxicated with
divine
love, he paced the long verandah north of his room. Now and then he
could be heard talking to the Divine Mother. Suddenly he said in an
excited voice, "What can you do to me?" Was the Master hinting that
maya
was helpless before him, since he had the Divine Mother for his support?
Narendra, M., and Priya were going to spend the night at the temple
garden. This pleased the Master highly, especially since Narendra would
be with him. The Holy Mother, (By this name
Sri Ramakrishna's wife was known among his devotees.)
who was living in the nahabat, had prepared
the supper. Surendra (The name by which
Sri Ramakrishna addressed Suresh Mitra, a beloved householder
disciple.)
bore the greater part of the Master's expenses.
The meal was ready, and the plates were set out on the southeast
verandah
of the Master's room.
Near the east door of his room Narendra and the other devotees were
gossiping.
NARENDRA: "How do you find the young
men nowadays?"
M: "They are not bad; but they don't receive any religious instruction."
NARENDRA: "But from my experience I feel
they are going to the dogs.
They smoke cigarettes, indulge in frivolous talk, enjoy foppishness,
play
truant, and do everything of that sort. I have even seen them visiting
questionable places."
M: "I didn't notice such things during our student days."
NARENDRA: "Perhaps you didn't mix with
the students intimately. I have
even seen them talking with people of immoral character. Perhaps they
are
on terms of intimacy with them."
M: "It is strange indeed."
NARENDRA: "I know that many of them
form bad habits. It would be
proper if the guardians of the boys, and the authorities, kept their
eyes on
these matters."
They were talking thus when Sri Ramakrishna came to them and asked
with a smile, "Well, what are you talking about?"
NARENDRA: "I have been asking M. about
the boys in the schools. The
conduct of students nowadays isn't all that it should be."
The Master became grave and said to M. rather seriously: "This kind of
conversation is not good. It isn't desirable to indulge in any talk but
talk
of God. You are their senior, and you are intelligent. You should not
have
encouraged them to talk about such matters."
Narendra was then about nineteen years old, and M. about twenty-eight.
Thus admonished, M. felt embarrassed, and the others also fell silent.
While the devotees were enjoying their meal, Sri Ramakrishna stood by
and watched them with intense delight. That night the Master's joy was
very great.
After supper the devotees rested on the mat spread on the floor of the
Master's room. They began to talk with him. It was indeed a mart of
joy.
The Master asked Narendra to sing the song beginning with the line: "In
Wisdom's firmament the moon of Love is rising full."
Narendra sang, and other devotees played the drums and cymbals:
In Wisdom's firmament the moon of Love is rising full,
And Love's flood-tide, in surging waves, is flowing everywhere.
O Lord, how full of bliss Thou art! Victory unto Thee!
On every side shine devotees, like stars around the moon;
Their Friend, the Lord All-merciful, joyously plays with them.
Behold! the gates of paradise today are open wide.
The soft spring wind of the New Day raises fresh waves of joy;
Gently it carries to the earth the fragrance of God's Love,
Till all the yogis, drunk with bliss, are lost in ecstasy.
Upon the sea of the world unfolds the lotus of the New Day,
And there the Mother sits enshrined in blissful majesty.
See how the bees are mad with joy, sipping the nectar there!
Behold the Mother's radiant face, which so enchants the heart
And captivates the universe! About Her Lotus Feet
Bands of ecstatic holy men are dancing in delight.
What matchless loveliness is Hers! What infinite content
Pervades the heart when She appears! O brothers, says Premdas,
I humbly beg you, one and all, to sing the Mother's praise!
Sri Ramakrishna sang and danced, and the devotees danced
around him.
When the song was over, the Master walked up and down the northeast
verandah, where Hazra was seated with M. The Master sat down there.
He asked a devotee, "Do you ever have dreams?"
DEVOTEE: "Yes, sir. The other day
I dreamt a strange" dream. I saw the
whole world enveloped in water. There was water on all sides. A few
boats
were visible, but suddenly huge waves appeared and sank them. I was
about
to board a ship with a few others, when we saw a brahmin walking over
that expanse of water. I asked him, 'How can you walk over the deep?'
The
brahmin said with a smile: 'Oh, there is no difficulty about that.
There is a
bridge under the water.' I said to him, 'Where are you going?' 'To
Bhawanipur,
the city of the Divine Mother', he replied. 'Wait a little', I cried.
'I
shall accompany you.'"
MASTER: "Oh, I am thrilled to
hear the story!"
DEVOTEE: "The brahmin said: 'I am in a hurry.
It will take you some time to get out of the boat. Good-bye. Remember
this path and come after me.'"
MASTER: "Oh, my hair is standing on end!
Please be initiated by a guru as soon as possible."
Shortly before midnight Narendra and the other devotees lay down on a
bed made on the floor of the Master's room.
At dawn some of the devotees were up. They saw the Master, naked as a
child, pacing up and down the room, repeating the names of the various
gods and goddesses. His voice was sweet as nectar. Now he would look at
the Ganges, now stop in front of the pictures hanging on the wall and
bow
down before them, chanting all the while the holy names in his sweet
voice.
He chanted: "Veda, Purana, Tantra; Gita, Gayatri; Bhagavata, Bhakta,
Bhagavan." Referring to the Gita, he repeated many
times, "Tagi, tagi,
tagi." (This word is formed by reversing the
letters of "Gita". "Tagi" means "one who has renounced". Renunciation
is the
import of this sacred book.)
Now and then he would say: "O Mother, Thou art verily Brahman, and
Thou art verily Sakti. Thou art Purusha and Thou art Prakriti. Thou art
Virat. Thou art the Absolute, and Thou dost manifest Thyself as the
Relative.
Thou art verily the twenty-four cosmic principles."
In the mean time the morning service had begun in the temples of Kali
and Radhakanta. Sounds of conch-shells and cymbals were carried on the
air. The devotees came outside the room and saw the priests and
servants
gathering flowers in the garden for the divine service in the temples.
From
the nahabat floated the sweet melody of musical instruments, befitting
the
morning hours.
Narendra and the other devotees finished their morning duties and came
to the Master. With a sweet smile on his lips Sri Ramakrishna was
standing
on the northeast verandah, close to his own room.
NARENDRA: "We noticed several sannyasis
belonging to the sect of Nanak in the Panchavati."
MASTER: "Yes, they arrived here yesterday.
(To Narendra) I'd like to see you all sitting
together on the mat."
As they sat there the Master looked at them with evident delight. He
then began to talk with them. Narendra asked about spiritual discipline.
MASTER: "Bhakti, love of God, is the essence
of all spiritual discipline.
Through love one acquires renunciation and discrimination naturally."
NARENDRA: "Isn't it true that the Tantra
prescribes spiritual discipline in the company of woman?"
MASTER: "That is not desirable. It is a very
difficult path and often causes
the aspirant's downfall. There are three such kinds of discipline. One
may
regard woman (Woman is the symbol of the
Divine Mother.)
as one's mistress or look on oneself as her handmaid or as her
child. I look on woman as my mother. To look on oneself as her handmaid
is also good; but it is extremely difficult to practise
spiritual discipline looking
on woman as one's mistress. To regard oneself as her child is a very
pure
attitude."
The sannyasis belonging to the sect of Nanak entered the room and
greeted the Master, saying "Namo Narayanaya."
("Salutations to God." This is the way sadhus
greet one another.) Sri Ramakrishna asked them to sit down.
MASTER: "Nothing is impossible for God.
Nobody can describe His
nature in words. Everything is possible for Him. There lived at a
certain
place two yogis who were practising spiritual discipline. The sage
Narada
was passing that way one day. Realizing who he was, one of the yogis
said:
'You have just come from God Himself. What is He doing now?' Narada
replied, 'Why, I saw Him making camels and elephants pass and repass
through the eye of a needle.' At this the yogi said: 'Is that anything
to
wonder at? Everything is possible for God.' But the other yogi said:
'What?
Making elephants pass through the eye of a needle — is that ever
possible?
You have never been to the Lord's dwelling-place.'"
At nine o'clock in the morning, while the Master was still sitting in
his
room, Manomohan arrived from Konnagar with some members of his family.
In answer to Sri Ramakrishna's kind inquiries, Manomohan explained that
he was taking them to Calcutta. The Master said: "Today is the first
day of
the Bengali month, an inauspicious day for undertaking a journey. I
hope
everything will be well with you." With a smile he began to talk of
other
matters.
When Narendra and his friends had finished bathing in the Ganges,
the Master said to them earnestly: "Go to the Panchavati and meditate
there
under the banyan-tree. Shall I give you something to sit on?"
About half past ten Narendra and his Brahmo friends were meditating
in the Panchavati. After a while Sri Ramakrishna came to them. M., too,
was
present.
The Master said to the Brahmo devotees: "In meditation one must be
absorbed in God. By merely floating on the surface of the water, can
you
reach the gems lying at the bottom of the sea?"
Then he sang:
Taking the name of Kali, dive deep down, O mind,
Into the heart's fathomless depths,
Where many a precious gem lies hid.
But never believe the bed of the ocean bare of gems
If in the first few dives you fail;
With firm resolve and self-control
Dive deep and make your way to Mother Kali's realm.
Down in the ocean depths of heavenly Wisdom lie
The wondrous pearls of Peace, O mind;
And you yourself can gather them.
If you but have pure love and follow the scriptures' rule.
Within those ocean depths, as well,
Six alligators lurk1
lust, anger, and the rest —
Swimming about in search of prey.
Smear yourself with the turmeric of discrimination;
The very smell of it will shield you from their jaws.
Upon the ocean bed lie strewn
Unnumbered pearls and precious gems;
Plunge in, says Ramprasad, and gather up handfuls there!
Narendra and his friends came down from their seats on the
raised platform
of the Panchavati and stood near the Master. He returned to his room
with them. The Master continued: "When you plunge in the water of the
ocean, you may be attacked by alligators. But they won't touch you if
your
body is smeared with turmeric. There are no doubt six alligators —
lust, anger,
avarice, and so on — within you, in the 'heart's fathomless depths'.
But protect
yourself with the turmeric of discrimination and renunciation, and
they won't touch you.
"What can you achieve by mere lecturing and scholarship without
discrimination and dispassion? God alone is real, and all else is
unreal. God
alone is substance, and all else is nonentity. That is discrimination.
"First of all set up God in the shrine of your heart, and then deliver
lectures as much as you like. How will the mere repetition of 'Brahma'
profit you if you are not imbued with discrimination and dispassion? It
is
the empty sound of a conch-shell.
"There lived in a village a young man named Padmalochan. People used
to call him 'Podo', for short. In this village there was a temple in a
very
dilapidated condition. It contained no image of God. Aswattha and other
plants sprang up on the ruins of its walls. Bats lived inside, and the
floor
was covered with dust and the droppings of the bats. The people of the
village
had stopped visiting the temple. One day after dusk the villagers heard
the sound of a conch-shell from the direction of the temple. They
thought
perhaps someone had installed an image in the shrine and was performing
the evening worship. One of them softly opened the door and saw
Padmalochan standing in a corner, blowing the conch. No image had been
set
up. The temple hadn't been swept or washed. And filth and dirt lay
every
where. Then he shouted to Podo:
You have set up no image here,
Within the shrine, O fool!
Blowing the conch, you simply make
Confusion worse confounded.
Day and night eleven bats
Scream there incessantly. . . .
"There is no use in merely making a noise if you want to
establish the
Deity in the shrine of your heart, if you want to realize God. First of
all
purify the mind. In the pure heart God takes His seat. One cannot bring
the holy image into the temple if the droppings of bats are all around.
The
eleven bats are our eleven organs: five of action, five of perception,
and the
mind.
"First of all invoke the Deity, and then give lectures to your heart's
content. First of all dive deep. Plunge to the bottom and gather up the
gems. Then you may do other things. But nobody wants to plunge. People
are without spiritual discipline and prayer, without renunciation and
dispassion. They learn a few words and immediately start to deliver
lectures.
It is difficult to teach others. Only if a man gets a command from God,
after realizing Him, is he entitled to teach."
Thus conversing, the Master came to the west end of the verandah. M.
stood by his side. Sri Ramakrishna had repeated again and again that
God
cannot be realized without discrimination and renunciation. This made
M.
extremely worried. He had married and was then a young man of
twenty-eight,
educated in college in the Western way. Having a sense of duty, he
asked himself, "Do discrimination and dispassion mean giving up 'woman
and gold'?" He was really at a loss to know what to do.
M. (to the Master): "What should one do if one's
wife says: 'You are
neglecting me. I shall commit suicide.?"
MASTER (in a serious tone): "Give
up such a wife if she proves an obstacle
in the way of spiritual life. Let her commit suicide or anything else
she likes.
The wife that hampers her husband's spiritual life is an ungodly wife."
Immersed in deep thought, M. stood leaning against the wall. Narendra
and the other devotees remained silent a few minutes. The Master
exchanged
several words with them; then, suddenly going to M., he whispered in
his
ear: "But if a man has sincere love for God, then all come under his
control
— the king, wicked persons, and his wife. Sincere love of God on the
husband's
part may eventually help the wife to lead a spiritual life. If the
husband is good, then through the grace of God the wife may also follow
his example."
This had a most soothing effect on M.'s worried mind. All the while he
had been thinking: "Let her commit suicide. What can I do?"
M. (to the Master): "This world is a terrible place
indeed."
MASTER (to the devotees): "That
is the reason Chaitanya said to his
companion Nityananda, 'Listen, brother, there is no hope of salvation
for
the worldly-minded.'"
On another occasion the Master had said to M. privately: "Yes, there is
no hope for a worldly man if he is not sincerely devoted to God. But he
has nothing to fear if he remains in the world after realizing God. Nor
need a man have any fear whatever of the world if he attains sincere
devotion
by practising spiritual discipline now and then in solitude. Chaitanya
had several householders among his devotees, but they were householders
in
name only, for they lived unattached to the world."
It was noon. The worship was over, and food offerings had been made in
the temple. The doors of the temple were shut. Sri Ramakrishna sat down
for his meal, and Narendra and the other devotees partook of the food
offerings
from the temple.
Sunday, October 22, 1882
It was the day of Vijaya, the last day of the celebration of
the worship of
Durga, when the clay image is immersed in the water of a lake or river.
About nine o'clock in the morning M. was seated on the floor of the
Master's room at Dakshineswar, near Sri Ramakrishna, who was reclining
on the small couch. Rakhal was then living with the Master, and
Narendra
and Bhavanath visited him frequently. Baburam had seen him only once or
twice.
MASTER: "Did you have any holiday
during the Durga Puja?"
M: "Yes, sir. I went to Keshab's house every day for the first three
days
of the worship."
MASTER: "Is that so?"
M: "I heard there a very interesting interpretation of the Durga Puja."
MASTER: "Please tell me all about it."
M: "Keshab Sen held daily morning prayers in his house, lasting till
ten
or eleven. During these prayers he gave the inner meaning of the Durga
Puja. He said that if anyone could realize the Divine Mother, that is
to
say, could install Mother Durga in the shrine of his heart, then
Lakshmi,
Sarasvati, Kartika, and Ganesa2
would come there of themselves, Lakshmi
means wealth, Sarasvati knowledge, Kartika strength, and Ganesa
success.
By realizing the Divine Mother within one's heart, one gets all these
without
any effort whatever."
Sri Ramakrishna listened to the description, questioning M. now and
then about the prayers conducted by Keshab. At last he said to M.:
"Don't
go hither and thither. Come here alone. Those who belong to the inner
circle of my devotees will come only here. Boys like Narendra,
Bhavanath,
and Rakhal are my very intimate disciples. They are not to be thought
lightly
of. Feed (Feeding a holy man is considered
a meritorious act.) them one day. What do you think of Narendra?"
M: "I think very highly of him, sir."
MASTER: "Haven't you observed his many
virtues? He is not only well
versed in music, vocal and instrumental, but he is also very learned.
Besides,
he has controlled his passions and declares he will lead a celibate
life. He
has been devoted to God since his very boyhood.
"How are you getting along with vour meditation nowadays? What aspect
of God appeals to your mind — with form or without form?"
M: "Sir, now I can't fix my mind on God with form. On the other hand,
I can't concentrate steadily on God without form."
MASTER: "Now you see that the mind cannot
be fixed, all of a sudden,
on the formless aspect of God. It is wise to think of God with form
during
the primary stages."
M: "Do you mean to suggest that one should meditate on clay images?"
MASTER: "Why clay? These images
are the embodiments of Consciousness."
M: "Even so, one must think of hands, feet, and the other parts of the
body. But again, I realize that the mind cannot be concentrated unless
one
meditates, in the beginning, on God with form. You have told me so.
Well,
God can easily assume different forms. May one meditate on the form of
one's own mother?"
MASTER: "Yes, the mother should be
adored. She is indeed an embodiment of Brahman."
M. sat in silence. After a few minutes he asked the Master: "What docs
one feel while thinking of God without form? Isn't it possible to
describe
it?" After some reflection, the Master said, "Do you know what it is
like?"
He remained silent a moment and then said a few words to M. about one's
experiences at the time of the vision of God with and without form.
MASTER: "You see, one must practise
spiritual discipline to understand
this correctly. Suppose there are treasures in a room. If you want to
see them
and lay hold of them, you must take the trouble to get the key and
unlock
the door. After that you must take the treasures out. But suppose the
room
is locked, and standing outside the door you say to yourself: 'Here I
have
opened the door. Now I have broken the lock of the chest. Now I have
taken out the treasure.' Such brooding near the door will not enable
you
to achieve anything.
"You must practise discipline.
"The jnanis think of God without form. They don't accept the Divine
Incarnation. Praising Sri Krishna, Arjuna said, 'Thou art Brahman
Absolute.'
Sri Krishna replied, 'Follow Me, and you will know whether or not I am
Brahman Absolute.' So saying, Sri Krishna led Arjuna to a certain place
and asked him what he saw there. 'I see a huge tree,' said Arjuna, 'and
on
it I notice fruits hanging like clusters of blackberries.' Then Krishna
said to
Arjuna, 'Come nearer and you will find that these
are not clusters of blackberries,
but clusters of innumerable Krishnas like Me, hanging from the
tree.' In other words, Divine Incarnations without number appear and
disappear
on the tree of the Absolute Brahman.
"Kavirdas was strongly inclined to the formless God. At the mention of
Krishna's name he would say: 'Why should I worship Him? The gopis
would clap their hands while He performed a monkey dance.' (With
a
smile) But I accept God with form when I am in the company of
people
who believe in that ideal, and I also agree with those who believe in
the
formless God."
M. (smiling): "You are as infinite as He of whom we
have been talking.
Truly, no one can fathom your depth."
MASTER (smiling): "Ah! I see you
have found it out. Let me tell you one
thing. One should follow various paths. One should practise each creed
for a time. In a game of satrancha a piece can't reach the centre
square until
it completes the circle; but once in the square it can't be overtaken
by any
other piece."
M: "That is true, sir."
MASTER: "There are two classes of
yogis: the vahudakas and the kutichakas.
The vahudakas roam about visiting various holy places and have not yet
found peace of mind. But the kutichakas, having visited all the sacred
places, have quieted their minds. Feeling serene and peaceful, they
settle
down in one place and no longer move about. In that one place they are
happy; they don't feel the need of going to any sacred place. If one of
them
ever visits a place of pilgrimage, it is only for the purpose of new
inspiration.
"I had to practise each religion for a time — Hinduism, Islam,
Christianity.
Furthermore, I followed the paths of the Saktas, Vaishnavas, and
Vedantists.
I realized that there is only one God toward whom all are travelling;
but
the paths are different.
"While visiting the holy places, I would sometimes suffer great agony.
Once I went with Mathur to Raja Babu's drawing-room in Benares. I found
that they talked there only of worldly matters — money, real estate,
and the
like. At this I burst into tears. I said to the Divine Mother, weeping:
'Mother!
Where hast Thou brought me? I was much better off at Dakshineswar.' In
Allahabad I noticed the same things that I saw elsewhere — the same
ponds,
the same grass, the same trees, the same tamarind-leaves.
"But one undoubtedly finds inspiration in a holy place. I accompanied
Mathur Babu to Vrindavan. Hriday and the ladies of Mathur's family were
in our party. No sooner did I see the Kaliyadaman Ghat than a divine
emotion
surged up within me. I was completely overwhelmed. Hriday used to
bathe me there as if I were a small child.
"In the dusk I would walk on the bank of the Jamuna when the cattle
returned along the sandy banks from their pastures. At the very sight
of
those cows the thought of Krishna would Bash in my mind. I would run
along like a madman, crying: 'Oh, where is Krishna? Where is my
Krishna?'
"I went to Syamakunda and Radhakunda (Places
near Mathura associated with the episode of Krishna and Radha.)
in a palanquin and got out to
visit the holy Mount Govardhan. At the very sight of the mount I was
overpowered
with divine emotion and ran to the top. I lost all consciousness of
the world around me. The residents of the place helped me to come down.
On my way to the sacred pools of Syamakunda and Radhakunda, when I
saw the meadows, the trees, the shrubs, the birds, and the deer, I was
over-
come with ecstasy. My clothes became wet with tears. I said: 'O
Krishna!
Everything here is as it was in the olden days. You alone are absent.'
Seated
inside the palanquin I lost all power of speech. Hriday followed the
palanquin.
He had warned the bearers to be careful about me.
"Gangamayi became very fond of me in Vrindavan. She was an old woman
who lived all alone in a hut near the Nidhuvan. Referring to my
spiritual
condition and ecstasy, she said, 'He is the very embodiment of Radha.'
She
addressed me as 'Dulali'. When with her, I used to forget my food and
drink, my bath, and all thought of going home. On some days Hriday used
to bring food from home and feed me. Gangamayi also would serve me
with food prepared by her own hands.
"Gangamayi used to experience trances. At such times a great crowd
would
come-to see her. One day, in a state of ecstasy, she climbed on
Hriday's
shoulders.
"I didn't want to leave her and return to Calcutta. Everything was
arranged for me to stay with her. I was to eat double-boiled rice, and
we were
to have our beds on either side of the cottage. All the arrangements
had
been made, when Hriday said: 'You have such a weak stomach. Who will
look after you?' 'Why,' said Gangamayi, 'I shall look after him. I'll
nurse
him.' As Hriday dragged me by one hand and she by the other, I
remembered
my mother, who was then living alone here in the nahabat of the
temple warden. I found it impossible to stay away from her, and said to
Gangamayi, 'No, I must go.' I loved the atmosphere of Vrindavan."
About eleven o'clock the Master took his meal, the offerings from the
temple of Kali. After taking his noonday rest he resumed his
conversation
with the devotees. Every now and then he uttered the holy word "Om" or
repeated the sacred names of the deities.
After sunset the evening worship was performed in the temples. Since it
was the day of Vijaya, the devotees first saluted the Divine Mother and
then
took the dust
(A form of reverent salutation in which one
touches the feet of a superior with one's forehead.)
of the Master's feet.
Tuesday, October 24, 1882
It was three or four o'clock in the afternoon. The Master was
standing
near the shelf where the food was kept, when Balaram and M arrived from
Calcutta and saluted him. Sri Ramakrishna said to them with a smile: "I
was going to take some sweets from the shelf, but no sooner did I put
my
hand on them than a lizard dropped on my body. (The
dropping of a lizard on the body is considered an omen.) At once I
removed my hand. (All laugh.)
"Oh, yes! One should observe all these things. You see, Rakhal is ill,
and
my limbs ache too. Do you know what's the matter? This morning as I was
leaving my bed I saw (Orthodox Hindus in Bengal
believe that the first face seen in the morning indicates whether the
day will
bring good or evil.)
a certain person, whom I took for Rakhal. (All laugh.)
Oh, yes! Physical features should be studied. The other day Narendra
brought one of his friends, a man with only one good eye, though the
other eye was not totally blind. I said to myself, 'What is this
trouble that
Narendra has brought with him?'
"A certain person comes here, but I can't eat any food that he brings.
He
works in an office at a salary of twenty rupees and earns another
twenty by
writing false bills. I can't utter a word in his presence, because he
tells lies.
Sometimes he stays here two or three days without going to his office.
Can
you guess his purpose? It is that I should recommend him to someone for
a
job somewhere else.
"Balaram comes from a family of devout Vaishnavas. His father, now an
old man, is a pious devotee. He has a tuft of hair on his head, a
rosary of
tulsi beads round his neck, and a string of beads in his hand. He
devotes
his time to the repetition of God's name. He owns much property in
Orissa
and has built temples to Radha-Krishna in Kothar, Vrindavan, and other
places, establishing free guest-houses as well.
(To Balaram) "A certain person came here the other
day. I understand he
is the slave of that black hag of a wife. Why is it that people do not
see
God? It is because of the barrier of 'woman and gold'. How impudent he
was to say to you the other day, 'A paramahamsa came to my father, who
fed him with chicken curry!' (Orthodox Hindus
are forbidden to eat chicken.)
"In my present state of mind I can eat a little fish soup if it has
been
offered to the Divine Mother beforehand. I can't eat any meat, even if
it is
offered to the Divine Mother; but I taste it with the end of my finger
lest
She should be angry. (Laughter.)
"Well, can you explain this state of my mind? Once I was going from
Burdwan to Kamarpukur in a bullock-cart, when a great storm arose. Some
people gathered near the cart. My companions said they were robbers. So
I
began to repeat the names of God, calling sometimes on Kali, sometimes
on
Rama, sometimes on Hanuman. What do you think of that?"
Was the Master hinting that God is one but is addressed differently by
different sects?
MASTER (to Balaram): "Maya is
nothing but 'woman and gold'. A man
living in its midst gradually loses his spiritual alertness. He thinks
all is
well with him. The scavenger carries a tub of night-soil on his head,
and in
course of time loses his repulsion to it. One gradually acquires love
of God
through the practice of chanting God's name and glories. (To M.)
One
should not be ashamed of chanting God's holy name. As the saying goes,
'One does not succeed so long as one has these three: shame, hatred,
and
fear.'
"At Kamarpukur they sing kirtan very well. The devotional music is sung
to the accompaniment of drums.
(To Balaram) "Have you installed any image at
Vrindavan?"
BALARAM: "Yes, sir. We have a grove
where Krishna is worshipped."
MASTER: "I have been to Vrindavan. The
Nidhu Grove is very nice indeed."