Narendra's scepticism — Narendra and M. — Devotees about the Master — Bliss of Brahman and bliss of the world — Master on Buddha — On "woman and gold" — Sri Ramakrishna and woman — Encouraging Bhavanath — Hirananda — Narendra argues with Hirananda — Narendra's spirit of renunciation — Master's exalted vision — Master and Hirananda — Girish and M. — Master's kindness to M. and his wife.
Wednesday, April 21, 1886
M AND NARENDRA were strolling in the garden of the house at
Cossipore. Narendra was very much worried because he had not yet
been able to solve the financial difficulties of his family.
NARENDRA: "I don't care for the job at the Vidyasagar School. I have
been thinking of going to Gaya. I have been told that a zemindar there
needs the services of a manager for his estate. There is no such thing
as God."
M. (smiling): "You may say that now, but later on
you will talk
differently. Scepticism is a stage in the path of God-realization. One
must pass
through stages like this and go much farther; only thus can one realize
God.
That is what the Master says."
NARENDRA: "Has anybody seen God as I see that tree?"
M: "Yes, our Master has seen God that way."
NARENDRA: "It may be his hallucination."
M: "Whatever a person experiences in a particular state is real for him
in that state. Suppose you are dreaming that you have gone to a garden.
As long as the dream lasts, the garden is real for you. But you think
of it as
unreal when your mind undergoes a change, as, for instance, when you
awake. When your mind attains the state in which one sees God, you will
know God to be real."
NARENDRA: "I want truth. The other day I had a great argument with
Sri Ramakrishna himself."
M. (smiling): "What happened?"
NARENDRA: "He said to me, 'Some people call me God.' I replied, 'Let a
thousand people call you God, but I shall certainly not call you God as
long
as I do not know it to be true.' He said, 'Whatever many people say is
indeed truth; that is dharma.' Thereupon I replied, 'Let others
proclaim a
thing as truth, but I shall certainly not listen to them unless I
myself realize it as truth.'"
M. (smiling): "Your attitude is like that of Western
savants — Copernicus
and Berkeley, for instance. The whole world said it was the sun that
moved,
but Copernicus did not listen. Everybody said the external world was
real,
but Berkeley paid no heed. Therefore Lewis says, 'Why was Berkeley not
a
philosophical Copernicus?'"
NARENDRA: "Can you give me a History of Philosophy?"
M: "By whom? Lewis?"
NARENDRA: "No, Überweg. I must read a German author."
M: "You just said, 'Has anybody seen God as I see that tree?' Suppose
God comes to you as a man and says, 'I am God.' Will you believe it
then?
You certainly remember the story of Lazarus. After his death, Lazarus
said
to Abraham, 'Let me go back to the earth and tell my friends and
relatives
that hell and the after-life exist.' Abraham replied: 'Do you think
they will
believe you? They will say it is a charlatan who is telling them such
things.'
The Master says that God cannot be known by reasoning. By faith alone
one attains everything — knowledge and super-knowledge. By faith alone
one
sees God and becomes intimate with Him."
It was about three o'clock in the afternoon. Sri Ramakrishna was in
bed.
Ramlal, who had come from Dakshineswar, was massaging his feet. Gopal
of Sinthi and M. were in the room.
Sri Ramakrishna asked M. to shut the windows and massage his feet. At
the Master's request Purna had come to the Cossipore garden in a hired
carriage. M. was to pay the carriage hire. Sri Ramakrishna made a sign
to
Gopal, asking whether he had obtained the money from M. Gopal answered
in the affirmative.
At nine o'clock in the evening Surendra, Ram, and the others were about
to return to Calcutta. It was the sultry month of April and Sri
Ramakrishna's
room became very hot during the day; so Surendra had brought some straw
screens to keep the room cool.
SURENDRA: "Why, nobody has hung up these straw screens. Nobody here
pays attention to anything."
A DEVOTEE (smiling): "The devotees here are now in
the state of
Brahmajnana. They feel, 'I am He.' The world is unreal to them. When
they come
down to a lower plane and regard God as the Master and themselves as
His
servants, they will pay attention to the service of Sri Ramakrishna." (All
laugh.)
Thursday, April 22, 1886
In the evening Rakhal, Sashi, and M. were strolling in the
garden at Cossipore.
M: "The Master is like a child — beyond the three gunas."
SASHI AND RAKHAL: "He himself has said that."
RAKHAL: "He sits in a tower, as it were, from which he gets all
information and sees everything; but others cannot go there and reach
him."
M: "He said, 'In such a state of mind one sees God constantly.' In him
there is not the slightest trace of worldliness. His mind is like dry
fuel, which catches fire quickly."
SASHI: "He described the different kinds of intelligence to Charu. The
right intelligence is that through which one attains God: but the
intelligence
that enables one to become a deputy magistrate or a lawyer, or to
acquire a
house, is a mean intelligence. It is like thin and watery curd, which
merely
soaks flattened rice but does not add any flavour to it. It is not like
thick,
superior curd. But the intelligence through which one attains God is
like thick curd."
M: "Ah, what wonderful words!"
SASHI: "Kali1
said to the Master: 'What's the good of having joy? The
Bhils are joyous. Savages are always singing and dancing in a frenzy of
delight.'"
RAKHAL: "He [meaning the Master] replied to Kali: 'What do you mean?
Can the Bliss of Brahman be the same as worldly pleasure? Ordinary men
are satisfied with worldly pleasure. One cannot enjoy the Bliss of
Brahman
unless one completely rids oneself of attachment to worldly things.
There is
the joy of money and sense experience, and there is the Bliss of
God-realization.
Can the two ever be the same? The rishis enjoyed the Bliss of Brahman.'"
M: "You see, Kali nowadays meditates on Buddha; that is why he speaks
of a state beyond Bliss."
RAKHAL: "Yes, Kali told the Master about Buddha. Sri Ramakrishna said
to him: 'Buddha is an Incarnation of God. How can you compare him to
anybody else? As he is great, so too is his teaching great.' Kali said
to him:
'Everything, indeed, is the manifestation of God's Power. Both worldly
pleasure and the Bliss of God are the manifestation of that Power.'"
M: "What did the Master say to that?"
RAKHAL: "He said: 'How can that be? Is the power to beget a child the
same as the power through which one realizes God?'"
Sri Ramakrishna was sitting in his room on the second floor. Narendra,
Rakhal, Sashi, Surendra, M., Bhavanath, and other devotees were
present.
Dr. Mahendra Sarkar and Dr. Rajendra Dutta were also there to examine
him. His condition was growing worse.
The house-rent was between sixty and sixty-five rupees. Surendra bore
most of the expenses and had rented the house in his name. The other
householder devotees contributed financial help according to their
power. A
cook and a maid had been engaged to look after the members of the
house-hold.
MASTER (to Dr. Sarkar and the others): "The expenses
are mounting."
DR. SARKAR (pointing to
the devotees) "But they are ready to bear them.
They do not hesitate to spend money. (To Sri Ramakrishna)
Now, you see,
gold is necessary."
MASTER (to Narendra): "Why don't you answer?"
Narendra remained silent. Dr. Sarkar resumed the conversation.
DR. SARKAR: "Gold is necessary, and also woman."
RAJENDRA: "Yes, his [meaning Sri Ramakrishna's] wife has been cooking
his meals."
DR. SARKAR (to the Master): "Do you see?"
MASTER (smiling): "Yes — but very troublesome!"
DR. SARKAR: "If there were no troubles,
then all would become paramahamsas."
MASTER: "If a woman touches me I fall ill. That part of my body aches
as if stung by a horned fish."
DR. SARKAR: "I believe that.
But how can you get along without woman?"
MASTER: "My hand gets all twisted up if I hold money in it; my
breathing
stops. But there is no harm in spending money to lead a spiritual life
in the
world — if one spends it, for instance, in the worship of God and the
service
of holy men and devotees.
"A man forgets God if he is entangled in the world of maya through a
woman. It is the Mother of the Universe who has assumed the form of
maya, the form of woman. One who knows this rightly does not feel like
leading the life of maya in the world. But he who truly realizes that
all
women are manifestations of the Divine Mother may lead a spiritual life
in
the world. Without realizing God one cannot truly know what a woman is."
Sri Ramakrishna had felt a slight improvement as a result of the
homeopathic treatment.
RAJENDRA (to the Master): "After getting rid of this
illness you must
begin to practise medicine as a homeopath. Otherwise, what's the use of
this
human life?" (All laugh.)
NARENDRA: "Nothing like leather!"2
(All laugh.)
A few minutes later the physicians took their leave. Sri Ramakrishna
and
M. were engaged in conversation. The Master was telling M. how he felt
about woman.
MASTER (to M.): "They say I cannot get along without
'woman and
gold'. They don't understand the state of my mind.
"If I touch a woman my hand becomes numb; it aches. If in a friendly
spirit I approach a woman and begin to talk to her, I feel as if a
barrier had
been placed between us. It is impossible for me to cross that barrier.
"If a woman enters my room when I am alone, at once I become like a
child and regard her as my mother."
As M. listened to these words, he became speechless with wonder at Sri
Ramakrishna's exalted state of mind. Bhavanath and Narendra were
sitting
at a distance, talking together. Bhavanath had married and was trying
to find
a job; so he could not visit Sri Ramakrishna frequently at Cossipore.
He
had said to M.: "I understand that Vidyasagar wants to start a new
school.
I have to earn my livelihood. Will it be possible for me to secure a
job in
that school?'' The Master was much worried about Bhavanath's being
entangled in worldly life. Bhavanath was twenty-three or twenty-four
years old.
MASTER (to Narendra): "Give him a lot of courage."
Narendra and Bhavanath smiled. Sri Ramakrishna said to Bhavanath, by
signs: "Be a great hero. Don't forget yourself when you see her weeping
behind her veil. Oh, women cry so much — even when they blow their
noses!
(Narendra, Bhavanath, and M. laugh.)
"Keep your mind firm on God. He who is a hero lives with a woman but
does not indulge in physical pleasures. Talk to your wife only about
God."
A few minutes later Sri Ramakrishna said to Bhavanath, by a sign, "Take
your meal here today."
BHAVANATH: "Yes, sir. I am quite all right. Don't worry about me."
Surendra came in and took a seat. The devotees offered garlands of
flowers
to the Master every evening. Sri Ramakrishna put these garlands around
his
neck. Surendra sat quietly in the room. Sri Ramakrishna was in a very
happy
mood and gave him two garlands. Surendra saluted the Master and put
them
around his neck.
All sat in silence and looked at Sri Ramakrishna. Surendra saluted the
Master again and stood up. He was about to leave. He asked Bhavanath to
hang the straw screens over the windows.
Hirananda came in with two of his friends. He was a native of Sindh,
about twenty-two hundred miles from Calcutta. After finishing his
college
education in Calcutta in 1883, he had returned to Sindh and taken
charge
of editing two papers, the Sindh Times and the Sind Sudhar. While
studying
in Calcutta he had often visited Keshab Chandra Sen and had come to
know him intimately. He had met Sri Ramakrishna at the Kali temple at
Dakshineswar and had spent an occasional night there with the Master.
Hearing of Sri Ramakrishna's illness, he now came to Calcutta from
Sindh
to see him. The Master himself had been very eager to see Hirananda.
Sri Ramakrishna pointed to Hirananda and said to M., by signs: "A very
fine boy. Do you know him?"
M: "Yes, sir."
MASTER (to Hirananda and M.): "Please talk a little.
I want to hear you
both."
When M. remained silent, Sri Ramakrishna asked him: "Is Narendra here?
Call him."
Narendra entered the room and sat near the Master.
MASTER (to Narendra and Hirananda): "I want to hear
you two talk."
Hirananda was silent a few moments and then after great hesitation
began the conversation.
HIRANANDA (to Narendra): "Why does a devotee of God
suffer?"
His words were sweet as nectar. Everyone in the room could feel that
his
heart was filled with love.
NARENDRA: "The plan of the universe is devilish. I could have created a
better world."
HIRANANDA: "Can one feel happiness without misery?"
NARENDRA: "I am not making a plan for a universe, but simply giving my
opinion of the present plan.
"But all these problems are solved if we have faith only in one thing,
and
that is pantheism. All doubts disappear if one believes that everything
is God.
God alone is responsible for all that happens."
HIRANANDA: "Very easy to say that."
Narendra sang Sankara's Six Stanzas on Nirvana:
Om. I am neither mind, intelligence, ego, nor chitta,
Neither ears nor tongue nor the senses of smell and sight;
Nor am I ether, earth, fire, water, or air:
I am Pure Knowledge and Bliss: I am Siva! I am Siva!
I am neither the prana nor the five vital breaths,
Neither the seven elements of the body nor its five sheaths,
Nor hands nor feet nor tongue, nor the organs of sex and voiding:
I am Pure Knowledge and Bliss: I am Siva! I am Siva!
Neither loathing nor liking have I, neither greed nor delusion;
No sense have I of ego or pride, neither dharma nor moksha;
Neither desire of the mind nor object for its desiring:
I am Pure Knowledge and Bliss: I am Siva! I am Siva!
Neither right nor wrongdoing am I, neither pleasure nor pain,
Nor the mantra, the sacred place, the Vedas, the sacrifice;
Neither the act of eating, the eater, nor the food:
I am Pure Knowledge and Bliss: I am Siva! I am Siva!
Death or fear I have none, nor any distinction of caste;
Neither father nor mother nor even a birth have I;
Neither friend nor comrade, neither disciple nor guru:
I am Pure Knowledge and Bliss: I am Siva! I am Siva!
I have no form or fancy; the All-pervading am I;
Everywhere I exist, yet I am beyond the senses;
Neither salvation am I, nor anything that may be known:
I am Pure Knowledge and Bliss: I am Siva! I am Siva!
HIRANANDA: "Good!"
SRI RAMAKRISHNA
(to Hirananda, by a sign): "Give him an answer."
HIRANANDA: "It is all the same, whether you look at a room from a
corner
or look at it from the middle. It is the same God-Consciousness that
one feels,
whether one says. 'O God, I am Thy servant', or, 'I am He.' One may
enter a
room by several doors."
All sat in silence. Hirananda said to Narendra, "Please sing some
more."
Narendra sang the Five Stanzas on the Kaupin:3
Roaming ever in the grove of Vedanta,
Ever pleased with his beggar's morsel,
Ever walking with heart free from sorrow,
Blest indeed is the wearer of the loin-cloth.
Sitting at the foot of a tree for shelter,
Using the palms of his hands for eating,
Wrapped in a garment fine or ugly,
Blest indeed is the wearer of the loin-cloth.
Satisfied fully by the Bliss within him,
Curbing wholly the cravings of his senses,
Contemplating day and night the Absolute Brahman,
Blest indeed is the wearer of the loin-cloth.
The loin-cloth of the sannyasi; it is an emblem of
renunciation.
As Sri Ramakrishna heard the line, "Contemplating day and night the
Absolute Brahman", he said in a very low voice, "Ah!" Then, by a sign,
he
said to the devotees, "This is the characteristic of the yogi."
Narendra finished the hymn:
Witnessing the changes of mind and body,
Naught but the Self within him beholding,
Thinking not of outer, of inner, or of middle,
Blest indeed is the wearer of the loin-cloth.
Chanting "Brahman", the Word of redemption,
Meditating only on "I am Brahman",
Living on alms and wandering freely,
Blest indeed is the wearer of the loin-cloth.
Again Narendra sang:
Meditate on Him, the Perfect, the Embodiment of Bliss;
Meditate on Him, the Formless, the Root of the Universe,
The Hearer behind the ear, the Thinker behind the mind,
The Speaker behind the tongue, Himself beyond all words:
He is the Life of life, the Ultimate, the Adorable!
I have joined my heart to Thee: all that
exists art Thou;
Thee only have I found, for Thou art all that exists.
O Lord, Beloved of my heart! Thou art the Home of all;
Where indeed is the heart in which Thou dost not dwell?
Thou hast entered every heart: all that exists art Thou
.
Whether sage or fool, whether Hindu or Mussalman,
Thou makest them as Thou wilt: all that exists art Thou.
Thy presence is everywhere, whether in heaven or in Kaaba;
Before Thee all must bow, for Thou art all that exists.
From earth below to the highest heaven, from heaven to deepest earth,
I see Thee wherever I look: all that exists art Thou.
Pondering, I have understood; I have seen it beyond a doubt;
I find not a single thing that may be compared to Thee.
To Jafar it has been revealed that Thou art all that exists.
As the Master listened to the line, "Thou hast entered every
heart", he
said by a sign: "God dwells in everybody's heart. He is the Inner
Guide."
As Narendra sang the line, "I see Thee wherever I look: all that exists
art
Thou", Hirananda said to-him: "Yes, 'All that exists art Thou.' Now you
say: 'Thou! Thou! Not I, but Thou!'"
NARENDRA: "Give me a one and I'll give you a million. Thou art I; I am
Thou. Nothing exists but I."
Narendra recited a few verses from the Ashtavakra Samhita.
The room
again became silent.
MASTER (to Hirananda, pointing to Narendra): "He
seems to be walking
with an unsheathed sword in his hand. (To M., pointing to
Hirananda)
How quiet! Like a cobra, quiet before charmer, with its hood spread."
Sri Ramakrishna fell into an inward mood. Hirananda and M. were seated
near him There was complete silence in the room. The Master's body was
being racked with indescribable pain. The devotees could not bear the
sight
of this illness; but somehow the Master made them forget his suffering.
He
sat there, his face beaming as if there were no trace of illness in his
throat.
The devotees had placed flowers and garlands before him as their loving
offerings. He picked up a flower and touched with it first his head,
then his
throat, heart, and navel. To the devotees he seemed a child playing
with flowers.
Sri Ramakrishna used to tell the devotees that his divine visions and
moods
were accompanied by the rising of a spiritual current inside his body.
Now he talked to M.
MASTER: "I don't remember when the current went up. Now I am in the
mood of a child. That is why I am playing with the flowers this way. Do
you know what I see now? I see my body as a frame made of bamboo
strips and covered with a cloth. The frame moves. And it moves because
someone dwells inside it.
"Again, I see the body to be like a pumpkin with the seeds scooped out.
Inside this body there is no trace of passion or worldly attachment. It
is all
very clean inside, and —"
It became very painful for Sri Ramakrishna to talk further. He felt
very
weak. M. quickly guessed what the Master wanted to tell the devotees,
and
said, "And you are seeing God inside yourself "
MASTER: "Both inside and outside. The Indivisible Satchidananda — I see
It both inside and outside. It has merely assumed this sheath [meaning
his
body] for a support and exists both inside and outside. I clearly
perceive this.
M. and Hirananda listened intently to these words about his exalted
state
of God-Consciousness. A few moments later Sri Ramakrishna looked at
them
and resumed the conversation.
MASTER: "You all seem to me to be my kinsmen. I do not look on any of
you as a stranger.
"I see you all as so many sheaths, (Referring to their bodies.) and the
heads are moving.
I notice that when my mind is united with God the suffering of the body
is left aside.
"Now I perceive only this: this: indivisible Satchidananda is covered
with
skin, and this sore in the throat is on one side of it."
The Master again fell silent. A few minutes later he said: "The
attributes
of matter are superimposed on Spirit, and the attributes of Spirit are
superimposed on matter. Therefore when the body is ill a man says, 'I
am ill.'"
Hirananda wanted to understand what the Master had just said; so M.
told him, "When hot water scalds the hand, people say that the water
scalds;
but the truth is that it is the heat that scalds."
HIRANANDA (to the Master): "Please tell us why a
devotee of God suffers."
MASTER: "It is the body that suffers."
Sri Ramakrishna seemed about to say something more. Hirananda and M.
eagerly awaited his words.
Sri Ramakrishna said, "Do you understand?"
M. said to Hirananda, in a whisper: "The body suffers for the purpose
of teaching men. His life is like a book of reference. In spite of so
much
physical suffering, his mind is one hundred per cent united with God."
HIRANANDA: "Yes, it is like Christ's crucifixion. But still the mystery
remains — why should he, of all people, suffer like this?"
M: "The Master says it is the will of the Divine Mother. This is how
She
is sporting through his body."
The two devotees were talking in whispers. Sri Ramakrishna asked
Hirananda, by a sign, what M. was talking about. Since Hirananda could
not
understand the sign, Sri Ramakrishna repeated it.
HIRANANDA: "He says that your illness is for the teaching of men."
MASTER: "But that's only his guess.
(To M. and Hirananda) "My mood is changing. I think
that I should
not say to everyone, 'May your spiritual consciousness be awakened.'
People
are so sinful in the Kaliyuga; if I awaken their spiritual
consciousness I shall
have to accept the burden of their sins."
M. (to Hirananda): "He will not awaken people's
spiritual consciousness
except at the right time. When a person is ready, he will awaken his
spiritual consciousness."
Friday, April 23, 1886