THAT DIVINE YEARNING

GOD cannot be seen without yearning of heart, and this yearning is impossible unless one has finished with the experiences of life. Those who live surrounded by 'woman and gold', and have not yet come to the end of their experiences, do not yearn for God.

When I lived at Kamarpukur, Hriday's son, a child of four or five years old, used to spend the whole day with me. He played with toys and almost forgot everything else. But no sooner did evening come than he would say, "I want to go to my mother." I would try to cajole him in various ways and would say, "Here, I'll give you a pigeon." But he wouldn't be consoled with such things; he would weep and cry, "I want to go to my mother." He didn't enjoy playing any more. I myself wept to see his state.

One should cry for God that way, like a child. That is what it means to be restless for God. One doesn't enjoy play or food any longer. After one's

experiences of the world are over, one feels this restlessness and weeps for God. (95)