man. Under his guidance, she realized her mistake and became repentant. He advised her to visit the Holy Mother.
One day she came to meet the Mother at the Udbodhan Office. She felt shy to enter the prayer-hall. So standing near the doorstep, she confessed to the Mother all her dark past, and said, "O Mother, what will be my fate? I am not even fit to enter this holy shrine to meet you." The Mother herself went forward and embracing the woman, told her lovingly, "Come, child, come inside. You have understood what is sin, and you are also repentant of your deeds. Come, I shall initiate you. Surrender everything at the feet of Sri Ramakrishna. Why should you fear?"
Accepting the sins and afflictions of mankind on her own shoulders and raising the 'fallen', it is only the all-compassionate Mother, who can smilingly say, "Why! Did Sri Ramakrishna come only to eat
rasagollas?"
14th April 1920
The evening Aratrika (vesper service) in the shrine was over. The Mother had fever. Rashbehari Maharaj was rubbing her hands and Brahmachari Varada her feet. They were taking her temperature, and the Mother was lying with her eyes closed. I stood by her side. Once the Mother asked, "Who is there?" Rashbehari Maharaj replied to her in a low voice. I heard that the temperature was 100.1 degrees.
Sister Sudhira was giving a treat to the girls of the Nivedita School, as it was the (Bengali) New Year's day. So Sarala, the disciple who was attending on the Mother, had gone to the school. The Mother asked Brahmachari Varada to bring Sarala from there; for, she had to feed Radhu's child. It was not yet time to feed the child but as he was weeping, Radhu wanted to feed him just then. The Mother tried to dissuade her. This only enraged Radhu who began to abuse the Mother. She said, "May you die, and I shall light your funeral pyre!" We were deeply pained to hear this. The Mother was so badly ill, and Radhu was abusing her in such a fashion at that time! Radhu, however went on shouting out many more abusive words. Such conduct on her part had become quite frequent. The Mother, who had unbounded patience, would put up with such behaviour on all occasions. But this time, due to her protracted illness she too got annoyed and remarked, "You will realize the consequences of this after-